I think I will start with the fact that…I fell in love with a knobhead…Again.

It’s the kind of love that I am not willing to let go of, ever.  But I can’t help it.

I’m sure that by Looking at my picture you can almost positively tell that I am a Muslim girl.  Since I don’t know if anyone reading this has any knowledge of Islam, (Educate yourselves honestly) Let me break it down for you. Islam preaches Peace, Islam preaches loving one another as brother and sister, Islam preaches respecting one another, regardless of who we are.  Funnily Enough, today I got told by a white non-muslim guy (who freakishly resembles Russell Brand) that Islam is right up there with Buddhism when it comes to peace and tranquility and respect and serenity.  Practicing Muslims aren’t perfect, none of us are, being perfect would mean we are up there with god, but we’re not.  We were made to feel, we were made to think for ourselves, we were made to make mistakes…which eventually would bring us all to ALLAH(god).  But some people out there claim to be Muslims, and do everything that Islam is against, they read something and adopt the most extremist view they possible to justify their cruel intentions.  But Islam isn’t the only religion who has extremists, may I remind you all of the KKK.   Organisations such as these taint a religion and distort its true nature for the outsiders.  Religion is easy to blame, but no ones going to say that these individuals were just plain knobheads who defiled a religion. But yes, that is the jist of it.  Islam is not a bad religion, and neither are the people who practice it.

but back to my story….

Love…a relationship between a man and a woman of a sexual nature is against Islam.  We’re not allowed to date before marriage, at least not without an escort.  Islam is very old fashioned when it comes to such things.  You know what after this past year of having a boyfriend, I think I agree with it.  I don’t know how girls can just sleep with anyone, Having sex with my boyfriend actually makes me feel bad, I have every intention of marrying him and he has every intention of marrying me.  But knowing that he’s slept with so many girls, He’s had so many girlfriends before me.  It Bothers me, makes me wonder what made them so special? what makes me better than them?  I don’t see myself as anything better than them.  Because I’m sure he loved them all, but he still left them right?  So I’m giving a man access to my body, that one day might not find me worthy enough to spend the rest of his life with me.  So if he leaves, I know I will regret ever letting him get so close to me, my mind, my body, my soul.   He wasn’t deserving, if he was, he wouldn’t have left.  He would have seen my worth and he would have stayed.    So yeah I get it, I get why religions are so strict when it comes to sex, and relationships. People don’t see it this way, but god is trying to save us from hurt, god is trying to save us from heartache.  How can I argue with that?

I regret ever letting him touch me in that way, I didn’t want to.  I wanted to stick to my faith but I got weak and I gave in, but now I feel as if he has no respect for me…because he feels that if I’ve been this way with him, I must be like this with other men.  Men!!! Honestly You’re Idiots.  Not all women are sex junkies, we can keep our pants on and our legs closed, unless you use force to open them up. (which would be rape by the way, Under UK law, the sexual offences act, section 1)  read up.  Like seriously if you try that shit with me or any of my friends, I kid you now You will be eating your balls for dinner, and that my darlings is GBH with intent and zero remorse.  Funny fact, A woman Can’t be charged with ‘rape’.

I could go on, But I’ll leave it at that